Thanks Grace for sending this one in!
Are you ready? Sitting down? Not drinking anything? Ok… here goes…
Hello, this is my lovely horse legacy. He has been in my family for 5 years. He truly is a wonderful creature. At night, his mane glows like the brightest of juptiers moons. It is what we in the horse world call “magical”. I give him daily protein shakes to make sure he countinues to grow big and strong. I don’t know when he’ll stop growing, he’ll probably countinue to until his time comes. Please be prepared to accommodate a horse the size of a small tank if you plan on keeping him for more then a month. I feed him a strict diet of cucumbers and horseradish. Some people say that it’s sick to feed a horse horseradish, but sense horse radish doesn’t actually have horse in it, I’m sure it’s ok.
800 OBO if you have any albino chickens we may be able to negotiate. Or 800 dollars worth of Fred Meyers gift cards so I can countinue to buy horseradish for my other horse.
Call xxx-xxx-xxxx to contact me. My name is [You can see it on the ad if you really want to know]. In order to ensure your not spam, please say “you have a magnificent stead on your hands I’d like to obtain. I’m pretty sure no telephone operator from overseas can say that correctly.
I LOVE that we know the horse is “magical” but not his breed, height, or training. I mean, “size of a small tank” only tells you so much!
Why the horseradish and cucumber diet? The protein shakes are obvious. A growing tank needs its protein, after all, but does horseradish have any nutritional value? -I honestly have no idea, don’t eat the stuff.
Oh Craigslist, you’ve done it again! lol